That’s why I asked Marketing Mentor client, Jezra Kaye, author of “Speak Like Yourself, No Really” –whose core business Speak Up for Success (www.speakupforsuccess.com) is one-on-coaching and custom workshops -- to do a session at CFC (the big event is right around the corner, June 22-24) called “Promote and Present: How to Speak Persuasively to Current and Future Clients, In Person and Virtually”

In the latest podcast interview for the CFC Speaker Series, Jezra and I dissect her session title and in the process, we answered these 3 common questions about speaking in public:

1. Why are so many people so afraid of speaking to a group? Jezra says, “It’s a scary proposition based on a misunderstanding. The reality is that audiences can be tremendously supportive (especially at CFC). They want you to succeed. So there’s no reason to be nervous about being judged.”
2. What’s the difference between promoting and presenting? Promoting is everything up to the moment when you get the project/engagement and presenting is when you show your work formally or informally and update the client on how things are going.
3. Should we present differently in-person vs. virtually? So much business is done virtually lately so we have to learn how to do that well. (We’re all still adjusting.) The biggest difference, of course, is that when you’re in the physical presence of someone, you get more information. You can see if they’re hassled or relaxed and you can detect nuances in how they speak or sit. When working virtually, you have to be more of a detective, probe more and listen more attentively.

For much more, listen to the podcast. Then join us at CFC (June 22-24 in SF) to learn how to do it! (And you can still get $50 off your registration with promo code "ILISE" -- register here.)

And you can find Jezra at speakupforsuccess.com, sign up for her monthly newsletter and check out her book. “Speak Like Yourself, No Really.”

As solopreneurs, many of us feel like we need to do it all. We try to wear all the hats, including the ones that don’t fit us so well. We feel like if we ask for help, we’ll appear inexperienced or incapable. But don’t underestimate the value of asking for help—no matter where you are in your career.

Last year, I read an article that changed my mind about asking for help: You Already Know The Right People For Your Business. In it, Caroline Ceniza-Levine explained that entrepreneurs already know the people who can help them succeed: they simply need to reach out to their existing network.

This made sense to me. I knew a lot of smart, successful people. So when I had a business question or needed advice, I started reaching out to people I knew. And guess what: I got answers! It made me realize that people—especially small business owners—are genuinely interested in helping each other (especially freelancers and members of the CFC community -- check out the active LinkedIn Group here).

So why try to wear all the hats? Got a question or problem? Reach out to a fellow solopreneur, former boss, colleague. I can almost guarantee you’ll find an answer.

The CFC Conference (June 22-24 in San Francisco) is a great place to ask for help. Reach out to a fellow solopreneur or speaker and you just might find that next great idea for your business. You can still get $50 off with "ILISE" promo code.

There is still space still available for the in-depth, hands-on half-day sessions with Ilise Benun and Mark O'Brien.

Monday (6/24) Morning Workshop w/ Ilise Benun: Determine Your Positioning and Find Your Target Market. You will walk out of this hands-on session with your positioning statement and a market to focus it on.

Monday (6/24) Afternoon Workshop w/ Mark O’Brien, CEO of Newfangled.com and author of A Web Site That Works: You Don't Know What You Know: Develop Your Content Strategy. You will walk out of this hands-on session knowing what your content is. (No more, “I don’t know what to say!”)

If you do both of these workshops, you'll be ready to start implementing as soon as you get home! No more procrastinating the marketing! Huge value for the price: $99.

You can sign up on site or in advance:

• If you aren't already registered for CFC, sign up here and include the post conference workshops.
• If you are already registered, follow these instructions:

1. To log into your personal registration record and add a Creative Freelancer Workshop, you will need your confirmation email; it is not possible to access your record without the link in that email. 
2. Click on the “Modify Registration” button in that email and enter your email address and confirmation number (also in that email).
3. Continue through the pages until you get to the Conference Options page where you can select the workshop you wish to add.
4. Click through the remaining pages until you get to the Payment page. You can pay by credit card here just as you did when you originally registered or you can choose the option to pay by check.
5. Which ever payment method you select, be sure to click on the "Complete Registration" button at the bottom of the page to finish the process and lock in your changes.

If you pay online with a credit card, it’s important to confirm that your payment was processed successfully. To do so, simply go back to your confirmation email and click on the “Invoice/Receipt” button at the bottom. If your balance is $0, the charge was processed successfully. If a balance due is showing, your credit card was declined and you should check with the provider to find out why.

If you have any questions or would like your confirmation email to be resent, contact Lyn at 800-436-8700 or howdesignlive@fwmedia.com and put “resend confirmation email” in the subject line.

We’re getting the job done

All three of us (Elke, Laura, and Tom) are doing self-promotion more consistently. Even when we fail to meet all of our goals for the month—incurring the dreaded penalty of wearing corporate clothes—self-promotion has become a regular part of all our routines. “Setting attainable goals that can be done within a month, each month, and ensuring that I hit the goals and set new ones has really helped me to remain focused on marketing,” Laura says.

We’re setting—and achieving—more realistic goals

One of the things we laugh about today are the grandiose things we used to plan to do in a month’s time. That’s not to say that freelancers shouldn’t have big goals, because all three of us do, but we now have a much more balanced sense of how much ambition we can handle in one 30-day period. We’ve also refined our strategies to focus on specific, measurable goals. “Setting nebulous goals doesn’t help,” Laura says.

We’re more relaxed and confident

Even though we only check in once a month, there’s less of a feeling that we live in freelance bubbles. Our buddies face the same challenges we do every day, which creates opportunities to learn from each other and an outlet for when we feel stressed or discouraged. One of the things that makes it work is that the roles are constantly changing: everyone in the group has been a “sage” or a “student” at one time or another.

“I spent a lot of my corporate career worrying about ‘getting in trouble’ if I didn’t get things done,” Elke says. “Now I’ve started to think differently about what it is that I’m doing. If I don’t do something I’ll lose a client, but I won’t ‘get in trouble.’ It’s a different, more confident persona.”

We’re wasting less time

Though the group was formed around self-promotion, we often share strategies for other aspects of our businesses. As luck would have it, that’s led to some productivity improvements for each of us. Laura has explored outsourcing options for some of her self-promotion tasks, Elke is benefiting from a daily planning routine, and I’ve developed an Evernote-based workflow that’s helping me stay organized and on schedule. (More on this in an upcoming post.)

We’re doing self-promotion even when we’re busy

A year ago, when this group was just getting started, I was scrambling for work. Today I have clients asking me questions like “are you at capacity right now?” Even though I know from past experience that the pendulum could swing back the other way at a moment’s notice, it’s only since we formed the buddy group that I’ve found a strategy that keeps my business development on track.

Now, no matter how busy I get, I regularly find myself thinking “What do I still need to do for the group this month?” and “What are my goals for next month going to be?” This may not save me from the next downward dive of the feast-or-famine monster, but it’s clear that the instinct to keep the marketing machine running—even when I don’t seem to need it—is finally starting to become a habit. From what my buddies are telling me, they’re experiencing something similar.

We’re inspiring each other to succeed

At the beginning of our last call, we quickly noticed that all three of us were dressed in “freelance casual.” No pajamas, mind you, but it was the first time ever that none of us showed up wearing the Corporate Clothes of Shame. It was the first time in a year that all three of us hit our goals for the month, but at the rate we’re going, it’s not likely to be the last.

Want to know more about how to launch a buddy group of your own? Laura and I will host a breakfast roundtable on Sunday, June 23 at this year’s Creative Freelancer Conference. Hope to see you there! (You can still get $50 if you register with promo code "ILISE")

Tom N. Tumbusch writes copy that creates action for creative agencies and green businesses. He publishes a free writing tips newsletter each month and periodically shares more casual wisdom on the WordStream of Consciousness Blog. His tiny solar-powered corner of the Internet can be found at www.wordstreamcopy.com.

My answer: “As much as you want. We’ll make the time.”

That’s the beauty of CFC (June 22-24 in San Francisco). The speakers will be sitting at the tables with you, milling around in the hallways with you, Netwalking with you, hanging out at the bar with you. Many of us will be sticking around for HOW after CFC is over. And some of us (me!) will be stocked with really good chocolate to help you overcome your fear of talking business with strangers. Business is scary. Ghirardelli chocolate is not.

My subject matter makes me take this accessibility even more seriously. I’ll be speaking twice, tackling the topics of client relations and working with corporate clients. Client relations is all about conversation. It’s a conversation between you and the client. It’s a conversation between you and your colleagues. And for a few days in San Francisco, it’s a face-to-face conversation between us. It doesn’t matter if your client is a small agency or a major corporation, in the end it’s just a conversation.

So when you’re back at the office and having a panic attack about saying “No!” for the first time, don’t hesitate to shoot an email or fire off a tweet to me or to any of the speakers you meet in California. We’ll back you up.

Alisa Bonsignore, of Clarifying Complex Ideas, has attended all 5 previous CFC conferences and this year we are so pleased that she will be one of the speakers. Her session is provocatively entitled: Saving Your Sanity Through Better Client Relations: How to Stop Apologizing, Say No Tactfully and Know When to Shut Up and Listen. You can listen to her recent podcast interview on the art of saying no (and much more).

And you can still get $50 off your registration with promo code "ALISA" -- register here.

Here is a blog post that highlights one of the most popular topics last year at CFC: Out in the Sticks: the Joys & Challenges of Running a Design Biz in a Small Community, led by Julia Reich of recently rebranded, Stone Soup Creative.

This year, we'll have not 1 but 2 days of roundtable discussions (Sunday and Monday) which means we have lots of room for your ideas.

So far, many of the speakers have volunteered to follow up their sessions with a breakfast roundtable to dig deeper into the issues they'll be speaking on. This is a great chance to get your personal questions answered by the speakers. (Listen to the podcasts in the CFC 2013 Speaker Series here.)

Plus, many attendees have already stepped up to lead discussions on the topics they'd like to learn about (i.e. you don't have to be the expert to lead the discussion -- just have a few questions ready).

Since we'll be in San Francisco, I even recruited legendary Pentagram partner, Kit Hinrichs, to lead a discussion entitled, Transitions: International Consultancy to One Man Band.

Here are a few of the topics already suggested. (If you have one in mind and would like to lead a discussion, email me at ilise@marketing-mentor.com)

• Anatomy of an accountability group
• How do you get there from here?
• Tools you use to run your business
• Running a business in rural area
• What if your passion isn’t digital?
• How to choose a good web developer or programmer

If you haven't registered yet for CFC and these topics make you want to right now, be sure to use promo code "ILISE" to get $50 off -- Register here.

• I'm not a business person.
• I don't like talking about myself.
• I hate self promotion.

...then I highly recommend this FREE training series --> "A Faster an Easier Way to Land Quality Clients" from Ed Gandia, who spoke at CFC last year in Boston -- gave an excellent session called "How to Craft a Marketing Plan You'll Enjoy Implementing."

If you missed his CFC talk (or just need a marketing refresher), check out this 3-part series (videos + PDF transcripts) on how to land more (and higher-paying!) clients with very short and simple  but highly personalized emails.

He'll show you how to use short and simple "warm emails" to take the fear and hassle out of finding quality clients. Great stuff!

Definitely worth putting in your email address to get access! http://bit.ly/SQ05Fe

Listen especially for the explicit detail she goes into about the variations on telling a client their scope is about to creep. There are many variations, including these:

• Well, this is a scope change. It doesn’t fall into what we’ve agreed to.
• You do remember that by going to another round of edits, it’s going to cost you.
• I know this is awkward but we’ve already used what’s in the contract…
• No, we have this agreement. It’s on paper.

“You can even be apologetic,” she says, "and say something like, 'I’m really sorry but you do realize that…' almost as if someone else negotiated the deal, not you!"

“Once it’s on paper it’s no longer about you and it takes on a life of its own. That makes a very big difference. The contract is your armor, the shield you use to protect yourself."

Listen to her language and, more important, the tone in her voice when she says these things. It makes a huge difference.

Listen to all the rest of the podcasts in the CFC 2013 Speaker Series here.

Meet Alisa in person at CFC 2013, June 22-24 in San Francisco. And get $50 off with promo code "ILISE" -- Register here.

Wait! What is an iNote?

Picture a publication and notebook combined. Essentially a collection of interviews with inspiring creatives (from both on and off the CFC stage) as well as tips and insights about how to make the most of the conference.

Combine that with custom note pages for you to write down all your insights from the sessions AND a place to start planning your next steps towards building your freelance empire.

Who’s it for?

500+ iNote books will be distributed to everyone attending the opening CFC session at HOWLive in San Francisco June 22-24, 2013!

Who’s involved?

The iNote is the brainchild of Canadian freelance designer, Crystal Reynolds, and it grew out of her first CFC experience. Here's how she tells it:

The iNote grew from a realization of the value that creatives bring to the table and wanting others who don’t necessarily get the same opportunity to immerse themselves in the same environment to feel part of such an amazing community.

It began when I walked out of the end keynote of the HOWLive Conference in Chicago 2011 – I was leaving with so much energy and inspiration all locked up inside me just bursting to get out. I needed something I could hold in my hands, to reference and re-experience the inspiration.

So I started a blog to document and share the insights I continued to learn as well as start the conversation with other creatives. (You can read more about how the idea began here.)

A few days later, I envisioned it: a coil notebook that had both the magazine content that I love to design PLUS a place to write down all my notes from the sessions AND space to take these insights and brainstorm my own ideas.

I'll write more soon about the history of how it came to be. But in the meantime, for 2013, the iNote has been elevated to an amazing printed piece that I hope will be treasured and referenced long past the last CFC and HOWLive session.

If you want one, come and get it at CFC 2013 in San Francisco, June 22-24. It’s not too late to register here...

In our interview, he also went into some detail about how to be a parent and a freelancer simultaneously, which brings up challenges of its own that many freelancers struggle with.

Jim started freelancing 25 years ago – the same year his son was born. And for 24 of those years, he was a single parent.

His advice to parents who are freelancing:  Keep things as simple as you can because it’s really intense. Accept the idea that you’ll do those 2 things as well as you can. Then choose one other thing for your life and that’s it!

Listen to the entire interview to find out what else he chose.

Thanks to CFC veteran, Kelsey Grafton, for the custom illustration. More info at www.kelseygrafton.com/Illustration.html